Wisdom of the Sages
Episode X
Fall 2009
Hello People of the World;
Oh man, I have gotten so busy that my little blog here has gone unchecked in some time. Forgive both the lateness and lightness of this month’s edition. But being busy is better than not being busy.
Of lately the weather has turned cold and rainy. Clouds fill the sky almost every day and the temperatures drop low. Fall is officially here. In a big way.
Let’s get started, shall we?
:[ First item of the Month: I think the most egregious crime that television has perpetrated and should be held accountable for is that it has introduced this insane ideology that we need to inject “Drama” into every little fucking aspect of our lives. You know?
:[ Man, is it just me, or are you also sick of every frinkin’ place playing the Beatles constantly over their sound systems? Every coffee shop, bookstore, grocery store, library, bus, train, restaurant, outhouse, doghouse and hen house, every building I have been in, in the last two months is blasting every single song the Beatles ever made, non-stop. I get it: the Beatles once existed! Sheesh.
Why the coffee shop I am in right now is playing the fricking Beatles! Oh come on!
:[ Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize: Why is everybody getting their panties in twist about this? The guy got one because his campaign united the US citizenry in such mass and scale in the cause of peace and change that maybe he does deserve it. It is not however, a moratorium on his presidency. Just so we’re clear. Man, it seems as if Obama hasn’t done one thing correctly since taking office nine months ago. I mean, I know W. Bush did not do a single wrong thing in all his eight years, so that’s a tough act to follow, you know?
:[ Turns out that Bank of America CEO Ken Lewis will NOT be getting his salary nor a bonus this year.
I guess he’ll just go home and wipe his tears with his share of the $700 Billion that he got already.
:[ Brett Favre still playing professional football at 40 years-old. Why is this a surprise? People, 40 is not even old! People are still working into their seventies. Get over yourselves!
:[ Speaking of Busy, it has gotten so bad that I am a week and a half, A WEEK AND A HALF behind in my Red Eye Crossword puzzles!
:[ My Review of “Inglorious Basterds”. Again CLICK HERE for what could be my masterpiece.
:[ In the midst of all this hullabaloo I have started reading “Three Kingdoms” again. Yep, I am once again drawn into the story of the fall of the Han Dynasty and of its heroes and villains, of battles great and personal. I don’t know what it is about it but every time I pick it up to read, I cannot help but finish it. This time I am reading the updated abridged edition. Liu Bei has convinced Zhuge Liang (Kongming) to join him and he has made his military debut by burning the armies of Cao Cao at Bowang.
:[ Chris Pine as Jack Ryan: I guess they signed the kid to play James Kirk in the reboot of Star Trek to star as Jack Ryan in the Tom Claney novel adaptation reboots. I guess they are trying to take it more into a “Jason Bourne” look and feel. Yeah, I liked this movie back when they were called Jason Bourne Movies. The thing that keeps bothering me is that the media always classify these flicks as Spy Movies.
The Jack Ryan series are NOT spy movies! Jack Ryan is a CIA Analyst, back before the CIA began torturing people they actually analyzed data and came to solid conclusions. Jack Ryan does that in the books. It is his Everyman representation of being in over his head and comes out saving the world that made him popular. To turn him into a Trained Killer ala Bourne will take away from the essence of the character.
I dunno, I never read the books. Heh.
:[ Redshade Productions Update:
Hamlet: This flick is still on the table. I meant it when I announced “Postponed Indefinitely” because it could also mean sooner than later. I have decided a few things straight away. The whole “Just pick up a camera and do it” schema did not work because the goodwill of fellow journeymen who want to create an artistic work is virtually non-existent in this world of instant YouTube fame. So, I will gather up and move on. The first step is finishing the script, then securing funding, because that is how you make a fucking movie, despite what the cine-istas think, HIRE crew, and schedule for a spring 2010 shoot. In the meantime, I will finish up a short section and use what I have available to shoot some short scenes to edit together to get the feel and look of the movie I want to make. I have the camera, I have a location, I have some actors, and all I need is a Gertrude. Anyone interested in this short shoot please get in touch.
Three Kingdoms: I soooooo want to shoot this now! After being inspired by seeing Red Cliff on the big screen, I am now more antsy than ever to make this adaptation of the book. So, as a first step, anyone want to read the outlined scriptment I have? Let me know. I think I can follow up Hamlet with this.
The Shoshoni Connection: Still re-writing.
A Rez Tale: my version of “A Bronx Tale” in the writing stage.
Interviews with the King: Should be posted to YouTube fairly soon. I want to re-edit and mess with the exposure and color of it some more. Look out for two videos (!) soon!!
:[ WOS Quick Movie Reviews:
The Informant! Matt Damon stars in this Steven Soderberg movie about a real-life whistle-blower and how crazy and goofy and out of hand it all gets. Much has been made about Damon’s gaining weight for the role, but it is his performance that is striking, all at once sad, and funny. Recommended.
Zombieland – Funny, original flick about the post-zombie world. Woody Harrelson is great. Funny, not matter what people think of him in real life, Harrelson delivers the goods every time. It is rare for an actor to do that. There is a funny cameo by the most famous of Ghostbusters. Recommended.
:[ Are we so bad off that the crazy guy from CNBC writes a book “Back to Even” on how not to make money but to just break even? Wow.
:[ Is anyone else getting tired of the whole Zombie thing? I have decided to invent a whole new genre of the “Not-Zombies”. Think of the scariest story involving zombies, but not zombies. Get it? Can you imagine that? Let me know.
:[ Of late I have been buying a series of different books simply because 1) I do not own a previous copy and 2) it’s a hardcover, special edition. Case in point. Some months ago, during the summer I happened upon a hardcover edition of Bram Stoker’s “Dracula” with illustrations by Edward Gorey. I have never read Dracula before nor had I been interested in doing so. But the idea of a hardcover edition, with a nice visible font and quirky drawings sort of appealed to me. So, the next time I saw it in the bookstore, I snapped it up.
I did the same thing with an illustrated edition of Miyamoto Musashi’s “Book of the Five Rings”, which featured a hardcover, packed with tons of cool, ancient samurai illustrations, and simply the translated text. No translator’s notes or anything like that, just the straight text translated for your own personal understanding. Cool. So, I laid down good money for.
I also bought my Little Sister a single, leather bound, hardcover edition of the first three books of The Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice. Neat. So, I’m always on the lookout for such things.
:[ Red Cliff – The Truncated Version (CIFF) Here are my thoughts on the US version:
So I attended a screening at the Chicago International Film Festival. I was so excited that this was playing a US theater and bought tickets to go. So, how was the two and a half hour, integrated version as opposed to two, two and a half hour movies? Well, it is still spectacular, grand, awesome and exciting. Can I live with what they cut out? Sure, but I was sad to see entire plotlines dropped.
What grieved me the most was the cutting of Zhao Wei’s spying subplot. While still there in a shortened form, I just missed seeing less of the beauty in the full version. But I would still recommend this to people. Besides, I have the two full versions on DVD.
High recommendation!
:[ So, I live in a building of smokers. I live across the hall from a chronic smoker. I am surprised none of the smoke alarms have gone off in the whole time I’ve been here. So, this last weekend I woke up in the middle of the night feeling like I snorted a bead or something up my nose. I awoke to the most dreadful smell of cigarettes. I simply covered my head and tried to go back to sleep.
The next day it felt as though my sinuses where on fire. I was not sick, but I was stuffy. So much so, that the sinus pressure gave me a raging headache. Later on, I felt that bead, or whatever, creep into my chest and I began to cough. The next night I had to sleep sitting up, as it seemed to be the only way to breathe. So, the next day I went out to meet my buddy Cuba. I was hard pressed to convince him I was not sick. We hung out late that day and suddenly I could feel a chill creeping in and my cough intensified.
That night I hacked up a lung and suddenly, I felt fine, my sinuses cleared and I breathed easier. No headache. When I woke up the next morning, the chill caught me and put me down for the day. Yergh. I was really sick then! I hate aggravated sinuses. I would not wish them on anyone. Really. So now I am just now getting over the chill I caught. Running around in the cold will do that though. So all of this wackiness has given me a sore throat, is what I'm saying.
:[ My Political Bit of the Month: Health Insurers are saying that the “Democratic” Healthcare Reform Plan will cause insurance rates to go up. Now, I’m not a Health Insurance Industry Economics Expert but, are they not the ones whom SET THE PRICES?!
In that context, it seems like they are threatening to raise prices. They are in fact threatening you and me.
:[ Speaking of reading ancient samurai texts and Three Kingdoms, I have gotten into the various text on The Art of War. First the James Clavell translation of Sun Tzu’s immortal texts, in which, of course, Clavell must punctuate the text with what he thinks it must mean. Why do anglo-historians do that?
The other tome is a translation by Thomas Cleary of the text written by Liu Ji and Zhuge Liang’s own studies on Sun Tzu’s The Art of War titled “Mastering the Art of War.” What is cool are two things 1) Cleary does not punctuate the text, but adds copious notes, and 2) Zhuge Liang’s own words on war. For those of you not in the know, Zhuge Liang known as Kongming was the Prime Minister and Military Leader for the Shu Han Dynasty at the end of the Three Kingdoms Period (190 – 265 bce). Yes, he is one of the main characters in the Three Kingdoms book! It is mind blowing to me to read his words after all these years. Awesome. Pick them up if you can.
:[ RIFFTRAX Live Encore: My Bonnie and I went to see “Plan 9 from Outer Space” once again in a replay of the live riffing Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, and Bill Corbet gave back in August. Still fresh and funny the second time around. I am happy to know that they will indeed continue.
:[ My Bonnie suggested that since I sound like such a cranky old man in these newsletters that I should consider changing the name from “Wisdom of the Sages.”
Hence, the brand new banner.
I hope you enjoy. Plus, vote on it if you like it and if enough readers do, I’ll officially change the name of this blog come January 2010.
:[ From the “This Just In” File: Today is/was National Bosses Day. Did you honor your boss? In my case, there are many, in addition to J down at the office: first and foremost, there is Charlotte, my Char, the first-est and the fiercest. Then, Bonnie, the Ex and my friend. Then, there’s the Big Boss. I mean the final level of the game Boss, the Omega. Keaton used to say, “I don’t believe in God, but I fear him.” Well, I believe in God and the only thing I fear is my little sister Rye. Happy Bosses Day everybody.
:[ Last Item of the Month: I was thinking about this when watching the trailer for “2012” and how everybody thinks the Mayans predicted the end of the world. I remember some idiots saying “too bad they couldn’t predict their own extinction”. I used to tell people “Secret Indian Knowledge” in what 2012 meant on the Mayan Calendar; Time to get a new calendar. That they thought they would still be around to get a new one.
But recently, reading an article on Science.com about a team of researchers finding some Mayan city building almost completely intact suggested that the Mayans just up and left, leaving everything behind. This hit me in two ways 1) it stated that there are still over 6 million “Modern Mayan” alive today, so they are NOT extinct but chose a simpler way of life; and 2) talking this over with my co-worker Debra, maybe the 2012 was a timetable they set for themselves.
You see, according to many the Mayans reached an acme of civilization and technology that many are still hard-pressed to give them credit for (It had to be UFOs, right Indy?), but maybe they saw it as a decadence and a taxing of natural resources and figured they had a limited time before it came crashing down, and chose a fixed pint in time, like the aligning of planets, and therefore left everything behind and now because they did so, 6 million Mayans still live today. Some food for thought. Now, don’t steal that idea and use it in your own Look Smart/I’m All Indian-y coffee shop talks, I’m putting it in my speaking event come May.
That will do it for this month. Wow, and I thought I was going to have trouble filling column inches. Well, that's what happens when you're such a cranky guy. You know?
Try to stay warm, folk. It’s turning cooler and cooler as we creep ever closer to that winter solstice. Let me know how you are oing and please vote on the new Blog Title. And if I haven’t heard from you in a while, it’s okay and safe to get in touch. All right? As Robert Frost once put it “Everything I learned about life I can sum up in three words: it goes on.”
Until Next Time, “I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control everything really are.”
© 2009 Ernest M. Whiteman III
