Thursday, November 19, 2009

November - Autumn 2009



Wisdom of the Sages

Episode XI

November - Fall 2009

Hello People of the World;

Fall is here at last in full force at last. (Have I said that before?) Thanksgiving is around the corner, yep, I celebrate. My Boo’s birthday is up after that. The oncoming of winter follows after. Then, the Annual National Deadline known as Christmas. Strange, that I had to turn on the air conditioner today. But it was very nice out. Then, chilly winds and rain blast us, reminding us of the might of autumn’s wake…

Let’s get started, shall we?

:[ First item of the Month: Have you ever thought about how many germs are on the OUTSIDE of the hand sanitizer bottle?

:[ I was talking to my buddy Cuba the other day as we drove about our old neighborhoods looking for a place to eat after seeing Red Cliff. In one of the windows was a poster for DJ-Someone-Or-Other’s (Usually purposely misspelled or with numbers or another pair of initials.) brand new album. Am I wrong in assuming that DJs usually “spin” records at clubs? Why would they be putting out albums? Don’t they just play other people’s records? Sure, they can get creative with how they “mix” one song into the next but it takes no more musical acumen than a great sense of timing. It’s not like they are singing or playing instruments or actually produced any of the music they “spin”, right?

So, why would a DJ put out an album? If it is a sample of how he mixes other people’s tunes, are they not just putting themselves out of work by making it accessible to that? I mean, why hire DJ-SUM-1 when you can just play his album?

Someone, please clarify this for me…

:[ Is it just me or is the idea that you can get “Free WIFI!” almost anywhere detrimental to creative writing? Which is why I am happy the faceless corporation known as Starbucks is the only coffee house that makes it available at a price, or I would get NO writing done. In between work, the Internet, and now my Playstation 2, it is a miracle that I am even writing this right now! I had to go to my local Starbucks to do so. All HAIL STARBUCKS!!

:[ Drinking alcohol may not be as healthy as first reported. You know, besides the Cirrhosis, the damaged kidneys, the depression of the central nervous system, the diffusion of alcohol into every biological tissue in the body, the disruption of reflexes or the impairment of senses leading to poor judgment often resulting in STDs or death by accident or overdosing. You know, besides all that, it’s not as healthy as first reported.

:[ I just scared this lady by catching her eye; I am on the second floor of the Borders in Evanston and she just walked out of the Century 18 theater. Hah! (Six hours of staring at the Century 18 exit finally pay off!)

:[ I want a baby. If only to use him or her to pick up chicks…

I kid. I kid.

Just saw this one guy in the Borders Coffee Shop doing just that. Getting numbers while the ladies cooed over his baby.

:[ My Review of “Inglorious Basterds”. Again CLICK HERE for what could be my masterpiece. Don’t worry, it’s coming and it’s gonna f*ckin’ rock, man! It’s going to be the best Men-on-a-mission-movie review EVER!

:[ So the IRS gave amnesty to 14,700 rich Americans whom have disclosed previously undisclosed foreign or off-shore bank accounts and assets. The Amnesty program end this week but not before an influx of wealthy “Taxpain’ ‘Mericans” finally admitted that they were not paying their full freight to our country. Man, we are a nation of Hypocrites.

Now that you wasted so much of our tax money, can you at least fill in a few potholes?

:[ This is why I love the media. YAHOO Headline: “Study: ‘Fearless’ 3-year olds might be tomorrow’s criminals”.

Scary huh?

But in the article itself, in the SECOND PARAGRAPH, it states: “There's no 100 percent correspondence between conditioning deficits and crime: Not all poor conditioners will become criminals and not all criminals have the early fear conditioning deficits," explained study author Yu Gao, a research associate in the department of criminology at the University of Pennsylvania.”

I mean, why that particular headline if they refute it right away?

:[ Redshade Productions Update: Stalling on all fronts! Thanks to that darned PS2 I got my writing has suffered drastically. I have yet to finish writing “The Shoshoni Connection”, get a first draft on “Three Kingdoms” and tackle Act Two of “Hamlet”. But recent developments may lend aide in this area, as you will find at the end of this month’s edition. Still, that is no excuse for not getting all of this writing done.

:[ WOS Quick Movie Reviews: Red Cliff at the CIFF was the last thing I saw on screen and probably will again before I see anything else.

:[ Seriously, people, get over it. Favre wanted to keep playing in GB but management would not let him. So he went to a team that would let him play in the division. Shut up. It’s just football.

:[ I am purposely steering away from the political this month as I do not want to give anymore attention to the business of stupid people.

So, the new “Clash of the Titans” trailer, or rather, the trailer to the remake of “The Clash of the Titans?” As “I Watch Stuff” put it, it is the best Slayer Video ever produced. I did notice that MAN MOVIES (ie: 300.) have posters and images that feature a lot of beefy guys with open mouths. Hmm, what all that about?

:[ The venerable Susan Power told me I am tall for an Arapaho.

:[ With the success of The Dark Knight, we should have seen this coming: Mickey Mouse contracts Miller-Moore Syndrome.

I coined the term the MILLER/MOORE Syndrome in a stage play about superheroes years ago. It was a reference to the whole “The Dark Knight Returns” and “The Watchmen” zeitgeist of the mid-to-late eighties when suddenly, due to the popularity of these comic series’ almost all superheroes “went dark”. Hell, even Spider-man got a black costume that time.

In my play, or rather “play concept” as I did not officially “Write” it, but all my best concepts and terminology were parsed out and used and the “Writer” got the credit. Meh, that happens, anyways, in the play it was akin to PTSD for superheroes or alternately, an image-changing move to get better press. The hero would suddenly lose their sense of humor and go around wearing a black costume being more aggressive. In my play, the central figure goes through a trauma and responds in this fashion and her compatriots figure that its just “Miller-Moore Syndrome” and it will pass. It was neat idea that never caught on. Well, it could have.

Anyways, Mickey Mouse has contracted Miller-Moore Syndrome thanks to “The Dark Knight.”

:[ We all know that Chicago sports teams are synonymous with choking. Hell, the city itself has lost top raking in almost everything including syphilis cases. Then there comes this:

“Most know that the 1919 White Sox threw the World Series. But one year earlier, the Red Sox and Cubs met in the ’18 World Series, a series marred by a strike, a deadly bombing and a killer flu strain, all overshadowed by the most violent war in history. Like ’19, fix accusations abounded—by the Cubs. The Original Curse examines those rumors, taking the reader into 1918, into the minds of players, owners and managers. Get a sense of the time. See what gambling, baseball and America were like. See that, in the end, a fix was possible. And even forgivable.” – from the website promoting the book “The Original Curse”.

Seriously, are the Chicago Cubs SO DESPERATE to be known for something, ANYTHING in sports that they will try and take credit for throwing a World Series a whole year before the White Sox did? Geez.

:[ People die in a non-Native performed (No, not ceremonially led, but performed!) sweat lodge. You know, Natives have been practicing sweat ceremonies for centuries, and NO ONE HAS DIED! Makes you wonder, doesn’t it?

:[ Am I the only one that eats the muffin top last? Whenever I enjoy the muffin, I usually rip the top off and set it aside and eat the “stem” portion of the muffin. Does anyone else do this, or am I just weird?

What's that? Oh, okay, I’m just weird. Thanks.

:[ Playstation 2: I’ve slowly been making my way through the Dynasty Warriors Series. I finished DW2 and now just got DW3. There is the new DW6 for the Playstation 3 but I am not getting a PS3… yet. I hated these games with a passion because they distilled the story of the Three Kingdoms greatly and it seemed that was the only way any American knew about the Three Kingdoms. Yep, I had become a Three Kingdoms Snob!!! Hah.

So, I figured I should just let it go and I went ahead and got the first game (Which is labeled “2” for some reason.) and I thoroughly enjoyed playing it especially since I knew the story. So, now, I am a Three Kingdoms Hypocrite. I’m not too proud to admit that!

:[ You know, I just realized: George Clooney and I have the same problem!

:[ From the “This Just In” File: The Equalizer Edward Woodward passes away. I guess Heaven needed some equalizing done. But we need the Equalizer now more than ever because things obviously are not equal. A moment of silence y’all.

:[ Last Item of the Month: Seriously, how is Fantasy Football worth getting a few pages in the Chicago Tribune Red Eye paper? It’s just a gambling addict’s legitimized hobby. Yet it warrants sports coverage in our local ‘zine paper? Come on.

That will do it for this month.

So far the weather has been holding out and being nice to us. I dread the oncoming snows but if I could control the weather, I would hold the world to ransom! You know how you can tell that you are getting old? You talk about the weather way too much!

In other news, my modem finally died so I have been without Internet for a little while now. Heh, maybe I’ll get some writing done now. But now, I also have a handy excuse for the lateness of this month’s edition. Write back, comment, respond, because there is nothing sadder than a blogger begging for feedback and not getting any response, right?

Until Next Time, “I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control everything really are.”




© 2009 Ernest M. Whiteman III