Wisdom of the Sages
Episode VII
July – Summer 2010
Hello People of the World;
Yep, Summer is not only here, but it’s camped-out on the couch, bringing its’ buddies over, using your toothbrush and not going away anytime soon. It has gotten so hot that I turned my bed around to face the fan and to avoid the myth that sleeping in the wrong direction is bad luck. Since it is so hot, I'll keep it short....
Let’s get started, shall we?
:[ First Item of the Month: The other day My Bonnie pointed out to me that not even two years ago I was crying around about the blasphemy that is iced coffee. Yep, she caught me in a contradiction.
Now, I have never hid the fact that I am an un-closeted hypocrite. Most people should just get over the fact they sell out their principles on a daily basis. When you do, it is A-MAZE-ING.
Anyways, with the hot weather of late I enjoy a large, sweetened iced coffee is what I’m saying…
:[ Most kids do not want to admit that they have been duped into buying into the worst looking trends ever. Masked as some form of rebellion cool, they wear what is tantamount to rodeo clown clothing with their asses hanging out of the backs of their pants and before admitting they bought into a stupid trend will trying to make it into some form of “My Choice” nonsense.
Take the “Emo” look of today. It’s just the 80’s Punk Rock look re-packaged and re-sold to a new generation. Watch John Hughes’ “The Breakfast Club” and you will see the Original Emo Chick in Ally Sheedy’s character. Seriously. It’s just re-packaged to the new generation.
“Cool”, “Rebellious” and “Individuality” have nothing to do with it.
:[ Sitting in the Starbucks, I overhear a man giving his friend the worst advice ever. I cannot believe that is how the “Modern Man” thinks. Sheesh. From what I gather, in their very loud discussion, was about whether or not the man should buy a second car for himself.
The friend sounded like a car salesman trying to convince the man to get it, because “He should do it for himself, if it was him, he’d get it because the wife, while she drives everywhere isn’t making it about him. He should do it for himself, forget about how healthy walking everywhere is, (The man stated many times he enjoys walking a lot.) he should do it and get a car for himself, without regard to what his wife says”
Man, what a man. Is it common practice to criticize another’s marriage to sell a car? I don’t know.
:[ So, the Dominick’s store in my neighborhood replaced the very capable DVDPlay kiosks with a Blockbuster Express one. So, the other day I decide to try it and find Rob Marshall’s “NINE” that Bonnie was interested in seeing. It is a fairly new release but not widely popular.
Now, the Blockbuster Express works like DVDPlay and Redbox but with the same high standards of service like the regular Blockbuster Stores.
They did not have “Nine” available.
The very movie I wanted was NOT available for rent.
Just like a real Blockbuster!
:[ I was going to post an item here on Roman Polanksi but I do not want to waste the time on that slime.
Also, I have lost faith in Mel Gibson. At one point I hoped that he would pull out of it but he has simply lost it. Sure, you can say thethe girlfriend taped the episodes to sell on but if she filed charges, everyone would simply take Mel’s side. You see? She did it to prove she was not lying about his abuse…. Would you have believed her without those tapes? No, really, would you have?
:[ Quick Reviews of the tons of movies I’ve seen this year:
“Clash of the Titans” not that great. Hated that “I’m not your son/a God” nonsense from one-note Worthington that suddenly flips a 180 by movies end. It’s okay, the original wasn’t that great either, and if you thought so, only want to be counted among the Harryhausen groupies.
“Harry Brown” was a nice little thriller. Basically “Death Wish” in a small, British community with Michael Caine making an effective Charlie Bronson.
“Nightmare on Elm Street”: yeah, didn’t care for this one. Poor Jackie Haley, all that’s left is genre roles.
“Shrek 4”, yep, saw this with the Boo. It was an enjoyable farce with a tired “Don’t know what you got…” lesson attached. Funny in parts but none too memorable.
“The A-Team”; What I hate most is movies based on old TV shows or remakes must always throwback to the original as if that somehow validates it but leaves it without any integrity of its own as a movie. What I liked about this funny action-er was that they balanced out the nostalgia. Saw with the Boo.
“Toy Story 3” the best of the three. Andy’s speech at the end while holding the shot of Woody made me cry. I am not ashamed to say that.
“The Last Airbender”: An overall weak effort from Shyamalan. I liked it but it felt rushed, as if he put too much into it. The casting never bothered me save for Assif Manvid of the “Daily Show”. That guy cannot do menacing. Now all the Geeks are screaming for “Unbreakable 2”.
Stay Tuned for my two-part essay “Geeks Fucking Ruin Everything!”
“Despicable Me” a very sweet little movie about adopted families. I loved it as much as “Toy Story 3”, really. There were a lot of funny and sweet moments and the animation was surprisingly good. The voice cast rocked as well.
I quick reviewed “Iron Man 2” and “Kick-Ass” earlier.
“Predators” is a worthy sequel. I bought into the concept, love the final Yakuza guy show down, was thrown for a loop at the Predator Blood Fued with the Pac-Man-faced Predators, but was disappointed at Laurence Fishburne’s character. It held my interest, I loved that action and looked forward to another sequel with that closing shot…. Then the credits rolled and they played that fucking, STUPID Little Richard song from the first “Predator” movie. Here we go again! Another stupid throwback to the originals. Come on. The concept fell apart for in the space of that song. Sorry. (Stay tuned for the afore-mentioned article...)
So, with “Kick-Ass” and “Predators” being a let-down, I am right now 0 for 2 on my Top 10 Most-anticipated Movies of 2010 list.
But then, there is “Inception” first thing tomorrow!
:[ Turns out that the “American Dream” is harder to achieve now than in the past. Yep, looking for that one opportunity to get your foot in the door but circumstance, who you are and where you come from closes a lot of doors?
“Welcome to the Club!” Why is it that what has affected minorities for years is not real until it affect the affluent?
:[ I don’t get how Indian Dudes treat their “Girlfriends”. They mock and tease and mess with their heads and all the while the lady is apologizing. Weird. I hope that it is not just a Native thing but I have noticed this primarily among the Native set. Correct me please…
:[ Why do people suddenly hate John Mayer? Someone tell me…
:[ Here’s how much of a loser I am: Have you ever been excited about new toothpaste? Well, being a poor bachelor, I have been using Pepsodent toothpaste for the better part of two years. So, when I see Arm & Hammer’s Baking Soda and Peroxide toothpaste on sale I snap it up. Man, I was soooo happy that I got it but had to wait a day or two to use up my Pepsodent. Then, I was so happy that I even got up early just so I could brush my teeth with my new toothpaste.
Yep, I was so excited that I went back to the store and got a second on-sale tube of Arm & Hammer. Loser Status: CONFIRMED!
:[ So why is LeBron James picking a team more important than the oil still leaking off-coast?
:[ The Iroquois Lacrosse Team not allowed to travel due to Tribally-issued passports. I guess that is the only way they could ever beat the Iroquois at their game!
:[ From the “This Just In” File: Harvey Pekar dies. So, instead of promoting him and supporting his works while he lived, I will profess my devotion to his art form now that he has passed on. I mean, he would want it that way. Right?
:[ Last Item of the Month: So, BP finally plugged the well after 2 and a half months and 184 MILLION gallons of oil spewed into the environment. Does this mean they aren't to blame anymore?
That will do it for this month. Pretty light on stuff this month but that is okay. I cannot b a crabby, old man every month. Let me know what you think. Feel free to comment, contradict and outright prove me wrong.
Until Next Time, “I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control everything really are.”
© 2010 Ernest M. Whiteman III
