Wisdom of the Sages
Episode IX
September – Autumn 2011
Hello People of the World;
Here we are soo close to fall and its cooler temperatures. Many people tell me that their favorite season is fall. I guess it would be mine but that is a bias towards my own childhood. I like spring myself. But cloudy, cool days are my favorite.
Liking a season means that you cannot complain about it, right? But some folk do. Seriously people, when did 65F become “FREEZING!”? Wait until it drops to 2-degrees, then you can complain. And I mean 2-degrees in September! Get a coat. Otherwise, besides you getting on my nerves, I hope you’ve been well? Been kind of busy as of late and nothing having to do with making movies. Oh well. That may explain the lightness of this month’s edition.
Let’s get started, shall we?
1:[ First item of the month: Due to my smugness and anger, I landed a teaching gig at the University of Wisconsin Parkside teaching the “Native Americans in Media” course and I had my first class last night. It was a lively bunch of students (I am loathed to call them kids because they are not.), some with Native ancestry in their backgrounds and all of them wanting to know more about Native culture in media. They are a cool bunch, I will admit.
They laughed at my jokes and asked questions when they wanted to know something. The staff members in the Communication Department are pretty cool and helpful as well. All in all, I am looking forward to the student presentations and teaching them about Native Americans in media, you know, if I don’t get all angry and self-righteous/pitying about it….
2:[ Talking with my Bonnie I saw a bumper sticker for the Lincoln High Warriors and thought about both the irony of that and the idea of naming the team something associated with whomever the school is named after. For example, a team called the Lincoln High Emancipators.
Can you imagine: the Kennedy School Rockets, (Because of the space program and the um, missile crisis.) or the Jackson High Indian Killers?! (Because he killed Indians. But then again, so did a lot of other Presidents.) Then, students would be forced to research the histories of the people their schools are named after.
I recently saw a bumper sticker for Mark Twain High School and had to really think on what their mascot would be if it were something associated with Twain…? The Twain High Injuns, perhaps?
3:[ On the bus today I happened to peek over the shoulder of someone who was texting. Now, the messages themselves were pretty mundane, boring really. Which begged the question, why didn’t they just use the phone to call?
4:[ It looks like David Guggenhiem, of “An Inconvenient Truth” and “It Might Get Loud” fame has produced and directed a documentary entitled "From the Sky Down" on the making of the hit album “Achtung, Baby!” by U2. Now, as you all know, I am an unabashed fan of the group and “It Might Get Loud” is one of my all-time favorite documentaries. So, seeing this made my flip my lid. Now we have a movie about one of their best albums and all the dramas that went into making it. Diehard fans know the story already but from all the positive reviews this has been getting, no one knows it like this. I am so looking forward to this. I just wish it got a theatrical release….
5:[ Ah yes, settle in Readers for more of:
Adventures at the Coffee Shop!
+ I’ve noticed a difference between the baristas who work at a Starbucks versus those that work for the Barnes & Noble coffee shop that serves Starbucks coffee. Yes, this is a complete generalization, but what can I say, it’s been consistent since I noticed it. Bookstore baristas seems like they know absolutely everything about books. It’s almost snobbish. While coffee shop baristas seem to know everything about everything else….
+ Well what do you know? It looks like I’ve become a “regular” at the coffee shop I frequent. Whenever I walk in and stand in line they begin preparing my usual drink for me. Medium Iced coffee, sweetened. (For you assassins out there). Which is pretty cool. So, cool of them in fact, that I am loathed to order what I really want; usually a large iced coffee sweetened. But, since I don’t want to hold up the line behind me I just pull my cash, exchange chitchat with the barista on the register and move on. Sometimes, when no one is behind me, I’ll change my order and talk at length with the folks there. Many of them know me by now.
+ It is absolutely cool to see kids in the coffee shop. They are soooo happy to get something and sit down and just be cool kids. It makes me sad how we royally screwed up the world that they have to live in. But it warms my heart to see them happy in the Now….
+ Oh yeah, that barista I told you about a while back? They finally just hauled off and punched me in the mouth….
6:[ Have you ever went out shopping for DVD’s and finally bought one you had your eye one for the longest time; maybe, you had no money when it was first released and then you scoured the secondhand places looking for the cheapest copy, but still you couldn’t bring yourself to spend the money but it kept bugging you and then one day, through a lucky string of circumstances, you have more than enough money and you stumble upon the very DVD, special edition you wanted in great condition for the cheapest price you have ever seen it sold for, so you snap it up, lay down your cash and head straight home and put it on your shelf next to all the other DVDs with the exact same story and you never watch because, hey, now you own it, you can watch it anytime you want and months and moths go by and one day while cleaning your place you come upon the DVD special edition with the deleted scenes, behind-the-scenes production documentaries, super-duper audio set up and super-de-duper cool commentary track and you pick it up and look at it and right then, you just have to wonder, why did you buy this again?
Yeah, me neither….
7:[ And now Wisdom of the Sages presents:
“An Ever-growing List of Things That MUST Stop!”
+ Giving extensive media coverage to weddings of people who are not famous for any reason. Or any wedding for that matter…. (When did weddings stop being just a family function?)
+ From Bonnie; You know, those stupid, straw porkpie hats made popular by JT? Those need to stop. Me: It looks like your head to too big for your hat!
+ As I’ve become accustomed to walking about everywhere, I often find myself developing curious habits. Some time ago, I told you about how I’ve more than once, measured my missed turns by assigning an imaginary self ahead of me and measuring my progress against “him”. Of late, when I find myself standing on the corner at intersections as a car pulls up, I stay there hoping the car would get the hint and move through the intersection. Now, I haven’t even stepped into the crosswalk yet, you know, where I’d have Right-of-Way and the car would have to yield to me as it would any other pedestrian in the crosswalk.
Yet, the car will stop and wait for me to enter the cross walk, hurriedly waving me to cross so they can ZOOOOOOM across even before I reach the other side. Really. I am maybe ten to fifteen feet from the edge of the sidewalk and I will visibly slow my pace to insure they do not have to wait for me to cross. But they don’t. They slam on the brakes and hurriedly wave me past. I sometimes wave them forward because I am WAAAAAAAAY back from the crosswalk to even think about crossing. It’s quite obvious that they have the Right-of-Way. But, no. They wave me passed again, this time, with anger on their face as if I dared ruin their courteous movements.
It has gotten so bad that I have to stop and pretend I’m looking at something on the ground or look at the street signs to pretend I’m lost. Sometimes, I don’t even cross, I’ll turn and go to the next intersection if I see a car slowly creeping to the crossing and the driver staring at me. I just don’t want to hold anyone up. That's all. It seems we are all in a hurry these days. Just don’t get mad if you clearly have the right of way and I choose not to cross.
Trying to get by WHILE I’M IN THE STINKING CROSSWALK, then honking at me like I’m in the way? That needs to stop….
+ This forgiveness of Roman Polanski. That needs to stop….
8:[ So, I went to attend a community writing project workshop at the Erie Neighborhood House. So, after I misjudged my stops and had to do a bit more walking to get the transfer, I end up arriving really early. So, I walk into the building following some people I think are also going to the workshop only to find out two things: they were attending an entirely different workshop, and the Erie Neighborhood House does not allow baseball caps to be worn indoors. It hosts several after school programs. So.
Like a rube I take mine off only after seeing the sign posted and a few seconds later, I find myself walking out the door having nothing better to do. Anyways, later on, I get back to the ENH to get to the workshop and remove my hat before entering this time and I go to the workshop. Afterwards, I put the hat on my head and walk out of the room. Now, once I get to the first floor, the workshop having happened in the third, I remember that I am not supposed to wear my cap inside, so I quickly take it off but then head out the door. The lady behind the front desk says, “No need to take it off now you’re heading for the door.”
I felt like a rube….
9:[ From the “This Just In” Department: I just knew it was a true story! I just knew it! “A Real Life Tatooine Discovered”. Now, where’s my life-sabers…..
10:[ Last Item of the Month: I was sitting in the book store coffee shop the other day when this family comes in with a rambunctious little boy. Now, I have nothing against the loudness of children and the parents that have to wrangle them, constantly. The kids are simply being kids and parents are awesome for keeping up. What made this little guy cool was that he was wearing a tie-on Batman cape. It looked like it was probably from a Halloween costume. He even ran up to some monkey-looking stuffed animals they had on display and proceeded to mete out justice on them by punching each of them in that playful kid way.
I was immediately transported to my own boyhood. I was a cape-wearer. All I had was towels though. I would have killed for an “official” Batman cape. Those old Halloween costumes never lasted with their plastic capes. I preferred safety pins to tying the corners and the fringed towels to the plain ones because they looked more like Batman capes. I even wore a shawl inside out because it looked like “Shazam’s” cape. I know. My brothers would make fun of me but I suspect they wore capes too once.
In fact in many of my childhood pictures you can see me wearing a bandana as a cape. I adore superheroes. I wanted to be one. I am one. But the mythology of them is what still attracts me. So, I still read comic books.
I remember once asking my dad if he saw or read any Superman comics as a kid. He told me “no” because they didn’t sell them in town, but when he was in the army he read a few because they were cheap. So, movies and comics are what I share with my dad. He even borrowed my Batman: Year One single issues to read but never got to. I regret him never getting to read those. Funny, how seeing a child still wearing a cape in this day and age makes you remember your own childhood.
That will do it for this month.
I hope the cooler weather is not too much for you to handle. Dude, it’s all just moving air anyways. Feel free to comment, to contradict, to correct or just to let others know what you think. And thanks to those who do so.
Until Next Time, “I try to show the schemers how pathetic their attempts to control everything really are.”
© 2011 Ernest M. Whiteman III
